Alan Gutierrez

A Visio template for New Orleans: Crime Scenes with Shapes.

Refugee Cottages from the 1906 San Francisco earthquake. Temporary housing sans formaldehyde.

I’m certain that PHP’s effect on the brain is similar to ether. I despise this language. It is joke gone too far.

Originally, I posted this in the comments of another blog, but want it as a point of reference.

How does someone engage with the industry about (one specific example of) real world use of social networking, without being overwhelmed by the Web 2.0 nonsense?

I’ve been teaching people how to use blogging to tell stories about their recovery in New Orleans. Stories and information sharing. People who’ve taken interest in my project in the industry have this horrifying attitude:

I couldn’t help but notice that you’ve created a user base, you obviously have not heard of the transformative power of (tagging / rss / podcasting / ajax). Have you told your user base about the exciting new startup datataggr.tv? You enter in all you contact information, the contact information of everyone you know, and then you (tag it/syndicate it/podcast it/jax off to it). It empowers your user base to be empowered.

Seeing as how there is no cost to me to have you deploy, endorse, or provide technical support for datataggr.tv, there must be no cost to you to do the same.

I’m sure that if you set people in front of datataggr.tv they will gladly spend hours exploring the user interface, divulging personal secrets, and that they will forgo their recovery planning meetings, coffee klatches, lunches, church services, mardi gras krewe parties, jazz concerts, and second line parades so that they can build their social network.

I can’t tell you how many times someone sends me a link to a startup website and says, hey bonehead, you need to sign people up to this one. Extra groan for each instance of the word empower.

I’ve got a nonprofit with a mission and it’s not to provide startups with beta-testers.

I know that some of these startups end up getting sold on eBay, with Dukes of Hazzard lunch boxes. How can someone seriously suggest that I direct people to pour their post-K recovery stories into the latest Web 2.0 information orifice?

I flog Flickr and WordPress. I’m thrilled when someone who attends a workshop actually starts to post entries in their new recovery journal, or neighborhood newsletter, (not a blog, it’s a FUD word).

I’ve answered my own question. It’s that stupid long tail again.

People don’t care about your splashy intro, logo.

They don’t want your identity.

They want your knowledge. If you have a nonprofit that is worth it’s salt, one that has information that is worth sharing, you need to put it where people can find it.

If not, fine. A nice flashy splash screen is good.

It tells us immediately that there is nothing there.

Reading the Copyblogger, Brian Clark, who makes Seth’s point, in Why Emotion Matters, as well as Seth does in It’s How You Tell It, regarding the Chris Bliss three ball juggling routine, and the five ball parody created by Jason Garfield.

The point is that Chris still puts on a better show. Why? Because, Jason makes juggling look boring.

Bloggers, what a useless lot. We are a community of critics. All we ever make are observations. Seinfelds one and all.

This is what happens when people set out to be clever in their observations, they state the obvious, but with an inflection that says, “Do I get a cookie now?”

Obviously, the purpose of Jason’s performance was to make Chris’ exertions look especially comic in light of Jason’s display of skill and ease. It was brilliant showmanship.

Yes, it does tell a story. Not with the maudlin sentiments of corporate communication, but with panache.

Moreover, the video he released on the heels of Chris’ viral distrubtion, meant that his video is now everywhere where Chris’ video is found. I tip my hat to such opportunism.

By far, my favorite overinflated bout of observational bather, the one that so clearly displays the lofty contempt the observer has for the specimens du jour is Sue Pelletier in Technical Brilliance is Not Enough.

As I watched Jason juggle, it was obvious that he is fantastic at what he does. But I wouldn’t hire him for a corporate event. He’s just not engaging. He looks alternatively show-offy, bored, and angry. Bliss seems totally engaged in what he’s doing, excited about it, even a little worried. He pulls us into his experience through his showmanship and makes it ours. Jason seems to be doing it all for Jason.

At breakfast, in the morning, after the day that I offer my opinons on the talents of complete strangers in terms of which complete stranger I would hire for a corporate event, feel free to put however much arsenic in my scambled eggs as you see fit.